i am not a fan of roller-coasters. I've never liked them, even as a kid. I think since I was a small child, I wasn't tall enough to ride them. I don't really remember. As a teen and adult, when I've tried them, it seems they are not built for my body, or my body is not built for them.
Once at disneyland a few years ago (i really did like going there when i lived in SoCal) Michael and I went on some snowy mountain-theme one. The "lap" strap hit me across my stomach and not my lap, so every time the thing jerked, the seatbelt hit my diaphragm and forced the air out. It was probably only a 2-minute ride, but gasping for air for that long is really not much fun. I did try to fix the belt, but couldn't undo it or force it lower.
Most other times I've been on roller-coasters, I walk away with big headaches. I think they mess with my inner ears. I dunno. Me and roller-coasters, we don't get along.
So why roller-coasters? Because I feel like I've been riding one lately. Up, down, up, down, sometimes a loop gets thrown in there. This emotional roller-coaster is really not much fun. It is leaving me exhausted. Yesterday is a prime example: llama shearing in the morning went better than expected, went to work and had a long talk with my boss about some stuff going on that left me feeling really sad, came home and had an awesome, incredible evening of food and games with friends, after the friends left, talked to my roommate about the stuff I talked to my boss about and felt sad, sad, sad. I have no gaps these days...my time is filled up so much that I ride the roller-coaster and I'm only half-feeling it sometimes. I want to be able to feel it all fully, to experience it all fully. I need to have more space between things, particularly between the things that I know have big emotions attached. I need to pull the break and slow down.
It is 9:30pm, and I'm going to start getting ready for bed. Step #1 in slowing down is getting more sleep and going to bed at a reasonable time at least one night this week!
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